My Creative Hustle VI

Thursday 08/06/17 | 9:51am

On Tuesday this week I realised just how much shit I’m in. I haven’t done anything wrong in terms of law, but I really got some perspective on the mountain I’m trying to climb.

It all started when I decided to head to a free APRA night in the valley where some guest speakers talked about accounting and tax for musicians/bands. I was fine, managing to get my head around the tax wasn’t too tricky, but as soon as @deenamusic started her presentation on budgets I could feel the intensity rise in my stomach. She was so REAL! I loved it, not sugar coating a dollar. Her experience working with @thejunglegiants was used as an example and the numbers were crazy. It really opened my eyes. It really made me realise where I am right now. Grassroots. I’m talking, it costs $20+ thousand to tour kinda numbers, where you break even or lose money. That’s what I made last year working 2 to 3 jobs. I have a big climb ahead.

The hunger inside of me begun to grow. My bike ride home consisted of ‘I can do this’ chanting in the cold wind. There’s nothing I want to do more than make rap music that I can tour and share with others, which made me realise all of the challenges ahead have to be faced and have to be climbed. I don’t have another option. So I tell myself I can do it. Because I know that I can and I want to.

This morning has been tricky. I am making a commitment to posting daily on social media, something I’ve never done before, and it’s cool but on the inside I’m totally freaking. I can feel the growing pains from so many directions right now. Rap, Blog, Vlog, Social Media. It’s crazy. I find that all I can do is grit my teeth and keep going. It’s definitely fun, and I enjoy making stuff but it’s also extremely hard. I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m literally just trying to better myself in every area I can.

I am smiling at the same time though, knowing that this is forcing me to grow is amazing. Because I’m out of my comfort zone, and that purely means I’m going to grow and I’m getting closer to that tour. I’m getting closer to that hit song. I’m getting tested. If I can push through this and the million other moments like it I can do anything. I already know that I can do anything.

If you see me looking all stressed out, I’m feeling intense but I am loving it. I couldn’t be more grateful for these challenges ahead of me. I am totally on the verge of crippling myself in copious amounts of escapism and binge eating, but I won’t. I will tough this out because that’s how my mum raised me, and what I’m fighting for is bigger than myself.

I’ve been reading ‘Jab, Jab, Jab Right Hook’ by @garyvee this week.
@_Instagav, @_dyllinger and @pineapplejam are still camping out in my lounge room. I love  having them around. And also @carlostrebilcock has been an insane help getting ‘Life Of PP’ off the ground. 100. We’re all keeping it 100. Also, big love to @becshoots for capturing my latest single artwork with @seanbarness. Seriously excited to put ‘Nicotine Fiend’ on the table.

And you, thank you for reading some of my story. I hope you keep up with the weekly updates and find it valuable to your life.

Even though life is crazy, I love you,

Professor Paul

My Creative Hustle V

29/05/17 | 6:22pm

@rickysaunders,

you are amazing. I am stoked to say that my house mate is the best homie out. El Ricko came down today and totally smashed the cleaning of our apartment. Not only did he clean/vacuum (including my bedroom) but he rearranged the lounge room and made me one happy dude. Little things like this are huge to me. I know it sounds like we are in a relationship when I talk about him sometimes and although we’ve been known to share a regular cuddle and a stray kiss it’s totally left at bromance. But I got so much love for this guy.

Love.

I wanna talk about that.

It’s something that we all need, and more importantly need to give.
I believe that love is something present in every type of relationship you create with a person. Whether it’s someone you’ve known since birth like your parents, a workmate, or the person at the bus stop with their earphones in we all have some relationship with them and because there’s a relationship, there’s love. Or is there?

I read a book back in 2016 called ‘The 5 Love Languages’ by Gary Chapman, and it was a huge insight into relationships for me. At the time I was reading it in hopes of being able to love my girlfriend better, and since the book is lined up for people in serious relationships it may be overlooked as something of value for everybody else. But I believe the concepts are 100 and really can be used in all relationships. So if you’re keen to give some love and really pour into/grow friendships/family connections keep reading and think about these concepts. I guarantee you by doing even one of them it will not make your situation worse.

Gary’s 5 languages:

Acts of Service, Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Gifts.

So here’s some examples of these 5 things:

What @rickysaunders did for me was an Act of Service. Without me asking he went ahead and took a load off of my life, and maybe he didn’t realise it but I felt very thankful and loved when he did that. The guy really saved me a lot of time and time is precious to me, so that spoke a million words. Let me stress, this language doesn’t mean you become a slave for someone and become their house made, it means that you show your love to them by taking a load off of their shoulders essentially when they don’t expect it.

It’s something that anyone can do. Is your mum/partner somebody who works really hard all the time and forever fixes the food for the family/cleans the house? Man, she’d proly not know what to do if you gave her some time off, so try cooking dinner and cleaning up afterwards, it might just be the highlight of her week! But remember, do it without expecting anything in return or making it known that you’re doing it because you’re such a good giver. Sit down, be HUMBLE and give.

Just briefly, Physical Touch is showing your affection through a hug, pats on the back or handshakes (in a relationship it’s like holding hands etc. Sex is a bit more complicated but it lives here too). Words of Affirmation is essentially being positive and encouraging another person with who they are in life right now, pointing out the good qualities in them and emphasising  how much they mean to you and the rest of the world (Try hand writing a letter to do this). Quality Time is literally no mobile phones or outside distractions and pure 1 on 1 with a person (walks, dinner, DnM’s, picnic). The last one is Gifts, and really is something you buy/make that you may not like AT ALL! But you buy/make it for your friend/family member because you’ve listened in conversation with them and know it’s something they’d love. I messed this up one time, I bought a caffeine molecule coffee cup to give to my bro Luke, but I ended up keeping it because really I wanted that cup from the start! (And plus, Luke really doesn’t dig chemistry… I kinda do).

The final layer to all this is that everybody receives love differently, rather, they understand some languages better than others. For example, I understand the language Acts of Service quite well and when somebody speaks that language (does an Act of Service for me) I feel extremely loved and appreciated. I believe this is because most of my life I’ve had to be fully independent in fixing my own dinners/lunches, organising my life and not having anyone else around to do it for me, that when someone comes in and says they’ll make me dinner or clean up the house I’m kinda like, what now? You’re going to do that? I thought I had to do that always and forever? The best way to get an idea of your love language is by taking this super short quiz. Once you’ve figured out what languages you understand best share them with your people figure out there’s, because what happens when you speak a language to someone who doesn’t understand it is you run into frustration and sadness very quickly.

To keep this post from reaching exponential lengths I’ve only elaborated on Acts of Services since it’s what happened to me 10 minutes before writing this post. I have barely scraped the surface of this topic too but I hope it’s encouragement to give more of a shit about the people in your life and show that you care. I’m certainly not the best lover out there but 100 want to keep striving for it everyday. Even if you never check this stuff out, what can you do to love more?

I love you,
Professor Paul

P.s Love is not supposed to be comfortable. When you give love to someone it can be hard, it can mean that you have to sacrifice your comfort for the betterment of the person you’re giving to. Love comes at a cost, and not always financial.

Feature Photo by @_dyllinger

My Creative Hustle – IV

22/05/17 8:18pm

Good evening, I say eloquently,

and welcome to another instalment of my life. Produced by me, acted by me and edited by none other than, me.

This is a me affair, and if you’re wondering why all the fuss of dilly dallying, I couldn’t quite tell you. I’m merely rattling off the contents of my brain straight to the page. Sure, that may be encouraged by the cheap white wine I am currently sipping on, but typically I don’t even know what to expect when it comes to my brain. So what the heck!

Lately I admit my focus has been vlog orientated and the attention I’ve given to writing about my life and documenting my hustle has been put slightly on the back burner. So I am very eager to be writing right now.

This last week has been interesting and I’m going to touch on it because I am grateful of the progress made. To sum it up I made headway with my latest single, which by the time of this blog’s release will be announced, it’s title: ‘Nicotine Fiend’. It features my homie @seanbarness, who I am so thankful to have worked with, as he has taught me so much about being a rapper indirectly by purely being a hardcore OG in and out the booth.
This week I also worked with @chloeminogue and @kevincollette on their respective tracks, etching out some solid demos layer by layer.
Something I realised, whilst working with both of these awesome people is that for a while there I wasn’t fully engaged in their projects as their producer. While this blog was still ‘My Creative Struggle’  most of my energy was spent entirely on my own project, which I am grateful for, however it really stunted my ability to grow. I believe this was the case because I wasn’t fully immersing myself into everything that I was doing for them. I was only making an effort on their projects because I’d signed up to them, not because I wanted to be the bomb and make killer music. Now that I look back on that it’s rather evident that I want to commit to these guys all of the way, for I know that I will not produce anything of value if I don’t. It’s either all in or not at all, binary, 1’s and 0’s. Truth be told that’s a phrase I picked up from @GaryVee this afternoon in his vlog. But it’s true, you’re either full hustle or nothing at all, because it’s not possible to have half your body in the water, you’re either in the water or you’re not.

GOkue
This made an addition to my wardrobe mirror collection, as Goku really developed my hardworking mindset. I loved that he would grit his teeth and overcome everything he set his mind to in DBZ. Definitely a childhood favourite worth remembering. (Sure I used to pull constipated faces regularly as I tried to go super sayan but hey… It was worth it). 

Maintaining exercise a little each day, has helped in terms of remaining more emotionally stable for me this week. I’ve got a chart that has a workout for everyday of the week blue tacked to my wall which kept me in check easily. I’m pretty sure it’s meant for the ladies, but I liked werkin’ dat ass and don’t care which neighbour saw through my balcony door at 4:45am (please take a seat). I recommend it to anyone who doesn’t have much time, but needs a clear head. Check it here. (If you have a killer routine that you follow, please link it to me <3)

As you also might know I made a commitment to eating healthier too. This is fuelled by the fact that I want to be an absolute machine rapper and life liver for the long haul, and the other truth that I HAVE treated my body poorly at times this year. An example, I had a family pack of Arnott’s biscuits set aside for my cuppa’s this week. Finished, in two days, gone. This was over Saturday and Sunday night. Definitely wasn’t an encouraging moment considering I hadn’t been that overboard with food in a while. However I’m more determined than ever to stay on track with meal preps and committing to keeping my eating in line. More pumpkin soup to come this week, that stuff is liquid gold.

This week  an area of my life that has been on my mind is scheduling. It got a bit out of hand at the start of the year and I’ve been hesitant to start again, but I know if I’m going to make the most of my time on this earth and do the things that I want to, I’ll need to schedule. It might seem like an overkill, but realistically I must make the effort to try. My time spent not at work isn’t always free, and I’ve got to allocate it wisely, to maximise the life that I do live. This time I am going to incorporate days off. Something I didn’t do prior. After last week it was evident that having rest really has it’s place as I stepped back and took Saturday and Sunday off. Working everyday, either at work on music is easy for me to do and get caught up in. Taking time off, really refreshed my perspective, I need this if I’m going to reach my goals.

Those were the key points in my week that I could think of tonight, so I’ma wrap it up with a quick message before I head off and do some reading. I want to say thank you. To everyone that’s in my life right now. Honestly, life looks very different now to what it did a year ago and I have been missing that past of late, however, I want to be grateful for what I have now. What is happening NOW is special, and all of you who are apart of my life and what I do are the reason that NOW is the best chapter.

The day I say I’m not in the best chapter of my life, is the day I’m not grateful enough to see what’s really good around me. Like they say, the grass is always greener on the other side, but really it’s greener where you water it. – @scott_loveday (not the original owner of this quote, but the man that has really taught it to me this past year)

Peace and love my brothers and sisters,

Professor Paul

My Creative Struggle V

Thursday 20/04/17 | 1:35pm

Sup homes,
I am actually a nervous ball of energy in this moment. The only way I can describe it is that I’m excited and freaked out at the same time. Weird. Like, I feel like I can own the world but I’m scared to start. Let me give you some context.

Yesterday it dawned on me that I really haven’t been taking control of my financial future. A big motivation for me leaving university was reading “Rich Dad Poor Dad” by Robert Kiyosaki. It flipped my whole perspective on money and had such a profound effect on me that I knew I really didn’t need a degree to achieve what I wanted in life. I just needed myself and a good mindset.
Anyway, I was having some well earned lunch after writing a new verse, accomplishing a Top Rock dance move and just having a genuinely ‘inspired’ morning. I sat down and put on a Gary Vee vlog feat. Tony Robbins (I have a Tony Robbin’s book unread in my book shelf at this stage so I was curious). I quickly realised in the first 10 minutes of their 1/2 hr conversation that what I’d set out to do financially was not coming to fruition, it was frustrating. For example, I have read at least 2 books on the power of compounding interest and how valuable it is to get that to work as early on in your life as possible for the simple fact that IT WILL MAKE YOU A SHITLOAD OF MONEY FOR DOING PRACTICALLY NOTHING! And yet this extremely simple step, I hadn’t embarked on yet.

Books
These guys inspire me and drop knowledge: @tonyrobbins and @therealkiyosaki.

So in my nervousness the 1/2 block of airy cadbury chocolate in my pantry, just, “vanished”… into my stomach. Yep, I nervous ate, while watching the video intently. I understood and really enjoyed what they were sharing but at the same time realised I was shitting myself with nervousness cause I hadn’t acted on my knowledge. Not wise. That was on my mind enough that I went straight back into my room picked up ‘Retire Young, Retire Rich’ by Robert Kiyosaki and the Tony Robins book that I hadn’t yet started and read (left) for the next hour or so. I was determined. I was determined to change my mindset so that I could actually make a difference. This leads to today.

I’m not gonna lie it started out great but I’m REALLY a mess right now.

I get up at 4am, journal, reply to some messages and start writing a new verse. By 5:50am I’m out the door on the bike riding to @kevincollett‘s place to shoot hoops. He welcomes me, makes me a cuppa and we’re chatting for a solid 15 minutes before he says, weren’t we supposed to shoot hoops yesterday?
It clicked. I just walked into a mans house at 6am on a week day, technically uninvited to shoot hoops… I’m THAT neighbour kid. *face palm*. Lucky Kev’s the chillest guy out and we still went to shoot hoops and had a rad morning.

I came back home finished writing a verse, read, had lunch, took a nap and put another Gary Vee vid on.

Que nervous feelin’s (This just keeps happening)

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 My feelin’s – @professor_paul

I watched DailyVee 203 with Kyle iSPY. It was genuinely inspiring the talk that they were having about churning out songs. Write it, release and continue. Just to produce content with a slightly less focus on quality. That idea has been on my mind before, and I’ve wanted to achieve it so I certainly got excited. So much that I ran into my room busted open the new rhymes, played them to myself and was thinking I need to finish them ALL! NOW! (rabid rapper frothing at the mouth with rabies… that’s exactly what I looked like). And I noticed, I’m just throwing myself back into the pit of anxiety yet again! Expecting the world in one minute.

Dumb move, bro, chill.

I feel like @Garyvee keeps showing me that I’m in need of some serious re-alignment in my life. Not because I want to be @Garyvee, but because he hits home topics that I’m passionate about, and haven’t been working towards.
I truly thought before watching the video all was good, and then in 10 minutes I’ve lost the plot!

I may be wrong, but I believe this would turn most people off from watching @Garyvee videos if they experienced the emotional roller coaster I’ve taken the last three days. But to be honest, as shit, frustrating and unbelievably annoying it is to feel all shook up on the inside. He’s right. He’s so right. And thanks to him, I have realised what I want to work towards. It’s like jumping in a cold shower, right now I’m screaming!!! But give it some time and I will inevitably adjust.

Quick emotional update. After writing this blog in the peak of my frenzy, I’ve actually settled down, and believe I could make a rational decision. Genuinely I’m amazed. Because not only am I sharing my life with you right now but by vomiting my emotional intestines up I’ve seemed to work my way to some decent conclusions.

Re-evaluate what it is I’m trying to do with my life. Align myself accordingly. And watch more @Garyvee! That’s my direction.

What is it that you’re running from or too scared to face? Is it a serious conversation with your partner/boss, is it admitting that you want to take what you’re doing to the next level? Hit me up in the comments @professorpaulcrawls (Facebook) or on ‘Tooooomato’ (5o’s) (Snapchat) with your answers/stories.

I’ll never stop lovin’ you,
Professor Paul

 

My Creative Struggle – IV

Man, my ears are just poppin’ right now. By poppin’ I mean my head is feeling compressed, and it’s feeling compressed because I am officially on an aeroplane heading back the beautiful BNE.

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Funny story: I was taking pictures of the isle and the air host came along and made me delete them… I shat my pants and I literally made him stand there for 30 seconds to delete 2 photos cause I was fumbling so much. Professor Paul, straight up terrorist/Bad ass. 

This morning I was in bed at 12:30am after having a few drinks at the bar of the Hostel and playing some Jenga with some swaggy Brazilian peeps. It was mad because the blocks were huge and the fall was rather spectacular. However, I was totally set on getting some sleep so I resided.

Before checking out of the Hostel I made use of the pancakes (cause I felt like free food) and ended up running into WHAM! @yvonnechow who I’d met on Friday night when I was gettin’ my boogie on to Hip-Hop tunes (as I tend to do, something just get’s inside my legs and I like to uncontrollably bust it). We chatted and I invited her along to hang with me at my fave cafe @littleroguemelbourne for a coffee and croissant. Dope spot, and I must say I owe it all to Cam from Kiki K (didn’t get her IG, sad face). Her suggestion to check out the blue door in Drewery Lane has seriously inspired my creative resurgence (If I ever run into Cam again, I’m going to hug her). Like I described earlier, the cafe is Star Wars and Hip-Hop influenced with banging coffee (my kinda jam). We headed there and spent the morning just chilling. It was real cool to meet someone from the UK and have a decent conversation, musical tastes were shared and before I knew it I was catching the tram to the airport.

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“Hurry up with my damn croissant” 

One thing I noticed about this trip was how many foreign people I met. I know that I travelled to another Australian city but honestly coming back home I feel like I’ve been doused in European culture. I find myself referring to my shoes as daps, 7:30 as half seven and pronouncing Hostel as Hostil. I genuinely think I’m ready to be Stormzy. Where my polo sock?

In terms of my creativity, I still haven’t engaged in writing today, but I’m not stressing about it. I know that I’m dead keen to get into it and work on my tracks, however I don’t feel like I’m doing it for anyone other than me. I know that I’ve got to nurture myself back to good creative health, and I will admit I’m still a little tender. But I do believe that this experience has helped put me in a better situation than I was a week ago. I definitely owe that to meeting other creatives on this journey. The beauty of going to a place totally unknown and building friendships is so enriching, at least that’s how I’ve felt. Now when I think back to last Monday morning when I hesitated to jump on the plane because of the cost, I definitely think the $1000 was well spent. The fact that my creative self has been enriched to some degree is enough on it’s own.
Next time I think about jumping on a plane I’m going to take it more seriously.

I know that I’d love to travel/tour my music and go round the world with it, but also on a more personal level, travelling’s cool.

My journey has really only just begun, so stay tuned for my next update from Coorparoo, BNE via my social networks.

Peace and love to you,
Professor Paul

(I been getting some incredible responses lately, feel free to hit me up in the comments or a message on my @professorpaulcrawls Facebook page, would love to hear your stories)